This is what I got to be a part of last night:




We opened up a very big, old High Anglican Church on one of the busiest streets in Camden from 10pm-5am. We had beer bottles and an egg thrown at the bulding, but that wasn't anywhere big enough to stop more than 115 people from walking in and talking with us about life and God (take that, Satan!). Some were drunk, some were tipsy, some were high, many were clear-headed, and all of them saw church portrayed a little differently than what they think it's about.

Tastes of Home

I've been told that the 4-6 month marker is one of the hardest periods in an adjustment to a new place. Personally, I would find that to be pretty accurate right now. I've been having a lot of moments when I've thought, "Lord, what in the world am I doing here?" or more often than not just really missing people back home and doing a lot of grieving. But in all of these feelings, frustrations, and bouts of lonliness, I've been noticing something pretty special- the kindness and care of my heavenly Father. And in one very tangible category that I've seen Him reaching His hand out and holding me is through providing me with tastes of home to encourage me along the way. I know that there are many that I've experienced that I totally didn't notice or took for granted (like rice pudding, conversations with my parents over the past few weeks, some encouraging emails and skype chats with people, etc), but here are a few that stand out a lot:

Getting to have lunch with my friend B, who was flying through on the way home. That was like a breath of fresh air!

-a care package from my cousin's kids, including letters that all of them had written to me, telling me that they're praying for me.


A massive bag of my favourite chocolate bar, which I can't get over here. Thanks to my sister's fiancee, who was over this week on business and brought me a big ol' bag of 'em (also very nice to have dinner with him and talk family).


A walk in the Autumn-struck woods on the east-end of London.





And to put a cherry on top of it all, I get to see my dear sister and brother-in-law today. So I just want to thank Jesus for these reminders of His care and love for me. It's like one of my team leaders told me on Thursday morning, "Your world is really good, E." Thanks Lord.

Being in London

A fellow apprentice friend recently wrote out things that she likes and misses with being in London. I thought I'd do the same!

SOME THINGS I LIKE ABOUT LONDON:

-There are coffee shops on almost every corner of the city. mmm... mochas!
-The independent, tiny bookshops around Leicester Square, where you can go hide in a corner down faraway and get lost in a book.
-The many big parks spread around the city that provide a nice oasis from the crazy busyness going on around them.
-The tube system--> while it's not the most enjoyable experience for me, it is amazing how huge the Underground is, and how easy it is to get around.
-My landlord. She gets stuff done fast when there are problems in my flat! :)
-YumChaa Tea shop on Parkway in Camden. It's fun being on a first-name basis with some of the workers there now. I even ventured behind the counter to help clean up today!
-My flat... It's starting to feel cozy.
-The history of this place. There is so much!
-Getting to stand outside Westminster Abbey and dream about the amazing discussions and worship services that have gone on in that place. mmm... church history!
-Dinner with good friends who are also trying to navigate through the big adjustment of being in cross-cultural missions and fulltime ministry.
-How ontime and regular the bus system is here. London has it figured out!
-Crisp, Autumn days with sunshine. I can't take it for granted! I hear that the "Grey Days" are coming!
-Tea outreach on Saturday nights, and talking to people at book table on Thursdays... Hearing people ask, "May I have a Bible, please?" Gives me shivers!

SOME THINGS THAT I MISS WITH BEING IN LONDON:

-Playing boardgames with S and N.
-How easy it was to bike over to my sister's and have dinner with them.
-My church community in Toronto... Missing that a lot.
-My bike, and the accessibility that it provides.
-Having an oven. I miss how easy it was to bake and having the space to have big groups of people over.
-Rolling down grassy hills and playing Monster with my niece and nephews.
-Autumn at the cottage, and getting to sit on the dock on a crisp Saturday morning and hear nothing.
-The girls.
-Driving... Didn't do it a ton in Toronto, but it was nice when I needed to.
-Dance parties with my housemates.

When you think you've hit the bottom,
and the bottom gives way.
And you fall into a darkness,
no words can explain.
You don't know how you'll make it out alive;
Jesus will meet you there.

He knows the way to whereever you are.
He knows the way to the depths of your heart.
He knows the way, because He's already been where you're going.
Jesus will meet you there.

When you've failed again,
And all your second chances have been used.
And the heavy weight of guilt and shame
is crushing down on you.
And all you have is one last cry for help.
Jesus will meet you there.

He knows the way to whereever you are.
He knows the way to the depths of your heart.
He knows the way, because He's already been where you're going.
Jesus will meet you there.

-Steven Curtis Chapman

Beauty in the broken

Wind

Last Monday I had the chance to go out to a retreat centre located on the outer edge of London. A bunch of the other women from the mission in London were there, and the purpose was to spend the day alone with God. One of my favourite moments in the day (along with getting to pet some beautiful donkies) was finding a hill in the middle of a big field, and sitting down in the grass. It was a beautiful day, and I couldn't see anyone. It was quiet, and the grass was just high enough to watch the wind rip through it. I'd sit there and hold my breath as the shadows of the wind moved through the field towards me, and then all of a sudden "shadows" of the wind were on me and I would feel a burst of air. It was amazing! I couldn't see the wind, but I could see and feel the effects of the wind.

Bob, our field director here, was recently talking to us about how we're in the inbetween time. There was the Old Age, but when Christ came, he ushered in the New Age. Now we're in a period where we still feel some of the effects of the Old Age (sickness, terrorism, death, lonliness, etc), but we also taste some of the New Age. And there is coming a day when Christ will return, and the Old Age will be completely abolished, and we will only experience the New Age (amen!).

This afternoon I sat on another patch of grass. This grass was cut short, and it was surrounded by city, and I wasn't alone. I sat with a girl whom I've befriended here. We talked about death, and she told me that she gets so scared when she thinks of dying, because she doesn't know what's to come. She thinks she believes in a heaven and hell, but "isn't that just another idea. No one really knows, right?" I experienced a different Wind moving in her as we talked about how there has to be something more to life than just living and dying (Doesn't history itself and all its atrocities show that we are so in need of saving?). I didn't have all the answers, and I fumbled with my words, and looking back, I should have brought Jesus into the conversation more. But I know that the Holy Spirit ("Wind") was poking at her heart.

Sitting on the hill last week and watching the wind weave through the grass, and feeling bursts of it on my face was similar to today. I can't see the wind, but I know it's there because I can see it at work. Sometimes I feel huge bursts of it against my face, and I can barely breathe because it feels so delightful (like conversations like today). And other times I struggle with feeling alone on that hill, wanting so much to just be able to SEE the "Wind" and stop struggling to really believe that it's all around me and moving in people's hearts. It was encouraging to see the effects of the "Wind" today, after my time on the hill last week, and be challenged to look for it more around me.

Psalm 34 was part of my reading this morning. I had forgotten how RICH and FULL OF PROMISES AND HOPE this psalm holds. I loved going back to it this evening and meditating on the words. God is so faithful and good and full of mercy.

Awkward conversation #323, or something like that!

So I'm on the Eurostar last night, heading back to London, and trying to distract myself from the fact that I'm in the chunnel, underneath tons of water.
The guy sitting next to me (who is British, has a PhD, and is probably my dad's age) and I are talking about the European Union, and some of the negatives impacts it has on the economy (like I know anything about that!).
Before I go any further, let's just say that on the topic of "Britain", I feel like I could list off credentials like the Apostle Paul- I've lived/studied in the UK for a year before this experience, I have English relatives, I can successfully cross the street now without worrying about being hit, I say "flat" instead of "apartment" when talking on the phone with friends back home, AND, I'm an adult. Pretty good credentials, I think. But maybe not?
Me to the learned man sitting next to me: So does the UK feel a lot of pressure to join the EU?
Learned man: hahaha! The UK has been a part of the EU since the 70s!
Me, feeling like a complete idiot (so long "credentials"!): aha aha... I am so ignorant.

Um, I THINK I knew that?